Page 32 (1/2)
The household was slu except for the indoor servants ere busy with coal and ewers of hot water, and those orked in the stables and gardens Aline passed a footboy who had been assigned the task of pushing the reen lahile another lad followed to collect the cut grass with a rake and a s the stable gutters, distributing hay, andout the stalls The familiar scents of hay and horses saturated the air with a pleasantly earthy s near the tack room Aline was tempted to run to him, equally as much as she wanted to flee in the opposite direction McKenna smiled faintly, but Aline sensed that he was fully as nervous as she They were both aware that this was one of the rare occasions when a single conversation ," Aline ed to say
McKenna looked at her in a way that suspended theo to the river"
Aline knew at once where he would take her…the spot that had always been theirs alone The perfect place to say goodbye, she thought bleakly, taking his arm They walked in silence, while the lavender tones of early dawn turned pale yellow, and long, light shadows crossed the lawn Aline’s knee joints felt stiff, as they always did in thebefore her scars were stretched bysmoothly, while McKenna matched his pace to her slower one
They finally reached the clearing near the water, where a pied wagtail circled the glittering reeds several tie, flat rock and arranged her skirts carefully, while McKenna went to stand a few feet away from her He bent to pick up a few s across the water with deft flicks of his wrist She watched hi lines of his profile, the easy grace of his lance at her over his shoulder, his turquoise eyes were so vivid in his bronzed face that the color see to ask," he said quietly
"Yes," Aline replied in , I must tell you that I will never--"
"Hear me out," he s that I want to say to you Difficult as this is, I’ret it for the rest ofshe couldn’t give hi to refuse you, no matter what you say" Her breath felt caustic in her throat, as if she had sed acid "Please spare us both the unnecessary discoruffly "It’s now or never, Aline After I leave toland?"
"To you" McKenna found a rock near hers and sat on the edge of it, leaning forward to brace his forearhs His dark head lowered for a leaaze "It was the curse of my life to be sent to this estate From the moment I first saw you, I felt the connection between us--a connection that should never have existed, and never should have lasted I tried to admire you from a distance…just as I saw the stars in the sky and knew I could never touch the, and I ith you too often, to preserve that distance You were my friend, my companion…and later I came to love you as deeply as any h I’ve lied tobreath "No matter hoant to deny it, I will always love you And noother than what I ahter of the peerage"
"McKenna," she beganback to Stony Cross was to find you That was fairly obvious, I think, as there was no practical reason to avail ourselves of your brother’s hospitality For that land at all, as Shaw could have h on his ohile I remained in New York But I needed to prove that what I felt for you wasn’t real I had convinced myself that I had never loved you…rather, it was that you represented all the things I could never have I thought that an affair with you would dispel those illusions, and you would turn out to be like every other wo of a reed warbler pierced the air "Then I planned to return to New York and take a wife A man of my position, even without a na bride is easy enough But now after finding you again, I’ve finally realized that you were never an illusion Loving you has been thein
"I a you, with all the humility I possess, if you will marry me, and coer need you as a hostess You’ll have no real place at Stony Cross Park But as my wife, you would be the queen of New York society I have a fortune, Aline, with the prospect of tripling it in the next few years If you co in my power to make you happy" His voice was so quiet, so careful, the voice of a amble of his life "Obviously it would be a sacrifice for you to leave your family and friends, and the place where you’ve lived since you were born But you could co only takes twelve days You could begin a whole new life with "
With every word he had spoken, Aline felt despair twist inside her She could hardly draw breath around the huge choking knot in her chest "You must believe ether I care for you, McKenna, but I…" She hesitated and took a pained gasp before forcing herself to continue "I don’t love you in that way I cannot marry you"
"You don’t have to love ive"
"No, McKenna"
He came to her, dropped to his haunches, and took one of her cold, perspiring hands in his own The heat of his flesh was startling "Aline," he said with difficulty, "I love you enough for the both of us And thereIf you would just try…"
The need to tell hih to drive Aline insane As she considered it wildly, her heart beat so hard that it hurt, and there was an icy prickling all over her skin She tried to envision it, showing hiht here and now No No
She felt like a creature caught in a net, struggling in vain to break free of the filahtened around her with every movement "It’s not possible" Her hands clenched into the soft silk of her dress
"Why?" The as harshly spoken, but there was a vulnerability behind it that made her want to weep Aline knehat McKenna wanted, and needed--a partner ould gladly yield herself to him, in and out of bed A wos he was, and never ht have been that for him But now that could never happen
"You’re not of my class," she said "We both know that"